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  • Man gives you the award
    but God gives you the reward.
             - Denzel Washington
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Quotes - Demitri Martin Featured

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I wrapped my Christmas presents early this year,
but I used the wrong paper.
See, the paper I used said 'Happy Birthday' on it.
I didn't want to waste it
so I just wrote 'Jesus' on it.
                                    - Demetri Martin
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